last week i witnessed a patient was being resuscitated in casualty for sudden worsening of consciousness and suspected intra-abdominal bleeding and at the end he didnt make it for the surgery. before he was sent to operating theatre for emergency surgery, i was asked by my senior to let the family know patient's condition and counseled them regarding the poor prognosis.

they didn't seem to understand at first when i mentioned patient was bleeding heavily inside the abdomen and we need to do emergency surgery on him and prognosis is poor. then it struck me a second or two that i need to say it more bluntly: patient has high chance of dying during surgery and will not make it if surgery is not done.  the wife and daughter were very shocked and started crying immediately. patient's whole bunch of family was waiting outside. he has another two children not more than 14 years old, all wailing in pain when they saw their father and son being pushed into the ambulance for transport to operating theatre, with breathing tube down his throat and bags of blood and fluid attaching to his limbs and neck. it's heartbreaking to hear those cry.

all can be done is done, but patient didnt make it. he passed away even before we start cutting the abdomen. post mortem revealed he suffered from severe major organS injury that cause the ongoing bleed inside the abdomen. even the surgery was done, i doubt we can do much better for him.

he came to us fully conscious and alert and left his family forever within hours after that. life can be so unpredictable. yet another time, i felt unsure how i can keep my loved ones and friends close to me. they may leave me, or i may leave some day, and that day may not as far away as i thought. like before, i felt uneasy and a bit heartbreak when this thought came to me, n have to force myself to attend to some other things.

we need to cherish every moment we have, either with ourselves or our loved ones. every moment we have with each other does not happen for granted.